Life's Questions

My girlfriend is having a miscarriage and I am feeling overwhelmed.

I was to the hospital on Saturday for myself. I could feel that I was getting sick with either bronchitis or pneumonia. I decided to go to the emergency department of my local hospital so I could be put on medication immediately instead of letting this get worse while waiting to see my family doctor on Monday.

When you are in a wheelchair, like myself, it is very obvious that you have a physical disability. I've used this and the whole set of challenges caused by my physical disability as an opportunity to encourage others. I know what it means to suffer.

While in the emergency department waiting room I was sitting across from a young man in his late teens or very early 20's. His facial expression showed the stress he was feeling.

I asked if I could talk to him. He agreed to this. I introduced myself. I told him just some of the challenges I've been through with my hips: I focused on the recurring surgeries and stints of physiotherapy I've endured during the past decade. I felt he could relate to this and talking about my chronic pain wasn't going to be helpful in this situation. I wanted him to understand that I knew what it is like to endure uncertainty and disappointment.

He shared the crisis he was facing: His girlfriend was two months pregnant and might be having a miscarriage. I could feel his pain. I've listened many times of people have talked of experiencing miscarriages and the grieving they have experienced following this. It became obvious just how stressful this was for him.

When I've gone through the biggest challenges with my disability instead of focusing on the big picture I've just focused on going a day a time. This has helped me not feel overwhelmed. Also I've set myself short term goals. This comes with a trust everything will be ok. It doesn't mean everything will go perfect. But I have confidence I will get through or learn new skills to cope with obstacles as they are presented to me. It means breaking down challenges into manageable pieces and asking for help and support from friends when needed.

God is present with us in our suffering and uncertainty. He is a close a short prayer calling out for His help. His comfort and hope sustains during the periods in life when uncertainty is overwhelming.

Prepared By: Ron Piggott

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